corrections of this english text?

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perik
Membre / Member
Posts: 2
Joined: 04 Jan 2010 23:39

corrections of this english text?

Post by perik »

Hi!

Ive written a short story I tried to translate from swedish into english. Can you please help me correct my translation?

thanks a lot for your inputs!!!
Almost six months have now past.

It was a day in the middle of August. The end of summer was getting closer but it was still warm as
in the midst of summer. Sofia and I were sitting in a café at Redbergsplatsen. Sofia had been abroad
and we hadn’t seen eachother for several months.

- It was in this neighborhood that we lived, with a family.
- Ah, is it over there or ...?
- Yeah exactly, in their basement. We had our own entrance and stuff. It was peak season for
tourists. They didn’t talk much … because they had people there all through the tourist season.

We flicked through the photos and Sofia explained the scenes. It was nice. I enjoyed sitting there at
the café with her. Right up to the end of the bunch of photos. It was something in the photo that was
not right. Kungsportsplatsen looked empty somehow.

-But isn’t the statue Kopparmärra usually there?
- Kopparmärra?
-You know the statue that standing on the market square.

Sofia had never heard of Kopparmärra. One of Gothenburg’s most famous statues. I assumed that she
just didn’t knew the name and I described the now green rusty statue depicting a man on his horse but
Sofia shook her head. She had no idea of what I was talking about. Kopparmärra seemed to have vanished
from the square.

Next day I left work early and biked down to Kungsportsplatsen. Kopparmärra was gone. Without any
visible trace. I considered that someone might have dismantled it. Maybe it was being renovated.

When I got back home I made dinner. In an effort to clear my mind I made an East African dish I had
never done before. But I couldn’t stop thinking about Kopparmärra. It was too weird.
P
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solbjerg
Membre / Member
Posts: 212
Joined: 01 Sep 2007 08:43
Location: Denmark

Re: corrections of this english text?

Post by solbjerg »

perik wrote:Hi!

Ive written a short story I tried to translate from swedish into english. Can you please help me correct my translation?

thanks a lot for your inputs!!!
Almost six months have now passed.

It was a day in the middle of August. The end of summer was getting closer but it was still as warm as
in the midst of summer. Sofia and I were sitting in a café at Redbergsplatsen. Sofia had been abroad
and we hadn’t seen each other for several months.

- It was in this neighborhood that we lived, with a family.
- Ah, is it over there or ...?
- Yeah exactly, in their basement. We had our own entrance and stuff. It was peak season for
tourists. They didn’t talk much … because they had people there all through the tourist season. (weird unexplained comment)

We flicked through the photos and Sofia explained the scenes. It was nice. I enjoyed sitting there at
the café with her. Right up to the end of the bunch of photos. (It) There was something in the photo that was
not right. Kungsportsplatsen looked empty somehow.

-But isn’t the statue Kopparmärra usually there?
- Kopparmärra?
-You know the statue that stands on the market square.

Sofia had never heard of Kopparmärra. One of Gothenburg’s most famous statues. I assumed that she
just didn’t know the name and I described the now green (rusty) verdigrised statue depicting a man on his horse but
Sofia shook her head. She had no idea what I was talking about. Kopparmärra seemed to have vanished
from the square.

Next day I left work early and biked down to Kungsportsplatsen. Kopparmärra was gone. Without any
visible trace. I considered that someone might have dismantled it. Maybe it was being renovated.

When I got back home I made dinner. In an effort to clear my mind I made an East African dish I had
never done before. But I couldn’t stop thinking about Kopparmärra. It was too weird.
P
I have put words into your story where I think it helps understanding and corrects spelling.

p.s. The "Copper Mare" is probably being emasculated to make it fit its name (it really is a stallion) :-)
Cheers
solbjerg
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