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Correction cover letter / lettre de motivation

Posted: 04 Jan 2017 19:13
by Meuge
Bonsoir !

Je voudrais postuler dans une école en Angleterre, serait-il possible de corriger mes fautes s'il vous plait ?

As far as I can remember, I have always been interested in Hospitality Industry for its great variety and the contact it provides with people, both team and guests.

I have therefor decided to get into a one-year preparatory class in 2014 in EHP Jean Drouant College – 20 Rue Médéric 75017 Paris – before starting a two year college technical degree in Hospitality and Catering in the same school, in which I am doing my second year at the moment. Those studies gave me the essential knowledges, the sense of hospitality and the curiosity to learn more that I think will help me for my future career.

While I was studying, I choosed to get a student job as waitress for both financing my studies and learning more about the industry. I also had two internships included in my education.

For the first one, I was hired as waitress, chambermaid, housekeeper and restaurant greeter, each one during one month, at the Fouquet’s Paris Lucien Barrière – 99 Avenue des Champs-Élysées 75008 Paris. It gave me autonomy and made me realize it was easy for me to blend into teams and to adapt to the industry. All that made me even more enthousiastic about the hospitality industry. Moreover, it helped me choosing hospitality rather than catering. Indeed, to me, Hospitality industry gives great opportunities to evolve in my career. Besides, this porfessional sector is related to design that is one of my interests.

Then, I decided to dedicate my second internship to Hospitality. I was hired to be housekeeper during sixteen weeks in Grand Hyatt Cannes Hôtel Martinez – 73 Boulevard de la Croisette 06400 Cannes. There, I noticed how satisfaying it was to challenge, analyse and solve guests complains and I realized that I was able to lead and to get on well with a team easily. Indeed, the bigest part of my work as housekeeper was to manage a team of six chambermaids by motivating them and making them provide quality work with a pre-work briefing. As I used to control their work, I can say that it produced positive response.

Those professional experiences and my love of travel – I have been three weeks in Bosnia and one week in Israel – helped me improving my English. Another one of my hobbies is workout. It is helpfull both for relaxing and stay healthy, which is really important in such an industry.

In ten years, I would like to lead or possesse a luxury hotel, anywhere in the world, that I would like to discover. Both those goals could be achieved by studying International Hospitality and Tourism Management.
Moreover, I am a well-organized, hard-working, studious, enthousiastic and dedicated to my studies person and I think that it could help me to get into this course at your university.


Merci d'avance, bonne soirée :love: :love:

Re: Correction cover letter / lettre de motivation

Posted: 04 Jan 2017 23:03
by Dada
C'est très bon, bravo !
Rien à redire si ce n'est quelques petites fautes de frappe : therefore, to possess.

Re: Correction cover letter / lettre de motivation

Posted: 04 Jan 2017 23:24
by Guest
Merci de votre réponse !

J'ai modifié le premier paragraphe, je pense que mes phrases sont mal dites ...

I have therefore decided to get into a one-year preparatory class in 2014 in EHP Jean Drouant College – 20 Rue Médéric 75017 Paris – before starting a two year college technical degree in Hospitality and Catering in the same school, I am currently a second-year student through distance learning programmes. Those studies gave me the essential knowledges, the sense of hospitality and the curiosity to learn more that I think will help me for my future career.

Encore merci !