une ptite joke...
une ptite joke...
Une ptite joke sur les blondes pas trop cruelle (mais en anglais, désolée !)
A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer.
She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to
borrow
$5,000.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the
deal,
so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce.
The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and
everything checks out.
The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank's
president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a
$250,000 Rolls as collateral against a $5,000 loan.
An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Rolls into the bank's
underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest,
which comes to $15.41.
The loan officer says:
"Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction
has
worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away,
we
checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us
is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The blonde replies:
"Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only
$15.41
and expect it to be there when I return?"
A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer.
She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to
borrow
$5,000.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the
deal,
so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce.
The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and
everything checks out.
The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank's
president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a
$250,000 Rolls as collateral against a $5,000 loan.
An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Rolls into the bank's
underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest,
which comes to $15.41.
The loan officer says:
"Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction
has
worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away,
we
checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us
is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The blonde replies:
"Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only
$15.41
and expect it to be there when I return?"
My life is perfect... because I accept it as it is
Elle est pas si blonde finalement
Je sens bien un petit topic joke là...
________
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would make up their faces in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips against the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day, the girls would do it again. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls into the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet bowel, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
There are teachers, and then there are educators...
Je sens bien un petit topic joke là...
________
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would make up their faces in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips against the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day, the girls would do it again. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls into the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet bowel, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
There are teachers, and then there are educators...
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.
D'accord pour un topic joke!
Bush, Einstein and Picasso
When Einstein died and arrived at the gates of heaven, St. Peter wouldn't let him in until he proved his identity.
Einstein scribbled out a couple of his equations, and was admitted into paradise.
And when Picasso died, St. Peter asked, "How do I know you're Picasso?"
Picasso sketched out a couple of his masterpieces. St. Peter was convinced and let him in.
When George W. Bush died, he went to heaven and met the man at the gates. "How can you prove to me you're George W. Bush?" Saint Peter said.
Bush replied, "Well heck, I dont know."
St. Peter says, "Well, Albert Einstein showed me his equations and Picasso drew his famous pictures. What can you do to prove you're George W. Bush?"
Bush replies, "Who are Albert Einstein and Picasso?"
St. Peter says, "It must be you, George, c'mon on in."
Bush, Einstein and Picasso
When Einstein died and arrived at the gates of heaven, St. Peter wouldn't let him in until he proved his identity.
Einstein scribbled out a couple of his equations, and was admitted into paradise.
And when Picasso died, St. Peter asked, "How do I know you're Picasso?"
Picasso sketched out a couple of his masterpieces. St. Peter was convinced and let him in.
When George W. Bush died, he went to heaven and met the man at the gates. "How can you prove to me you're George W. Bush?" Saint Peter said.
Bush replied, "Well heck, I dont know."
St. Peter says, "Well, Albert Einstein showed me his equations and Picasso drew his famous pictures. What can you do to prove you're George W. Bush?"
Bush replies, "Who are Albert Einstein and Picasso?"
St. Peter says, "It must be you, George, c'mon on in."
En ce jour de la nativité, je vais essayer de contribuer à ce topic :
Je suppose que tout le monde connaît la réponse à la devinette "qu'est-ce qui a deux yeux et cent dents ?" (le croco, bien sûr) mais savez-vous ce qui a cent yeux et deux dents ?
Je vous préviens tout de suite : c'est de l'humour très vaseux...
Je suppose que tout le monde connaît la réponse à la devinette "qu'est-ce qui a deux yeux et cent dents ?" (le croco, bien sûr) mais savez-vous ce qui a cent yeux et deux dents ?
Je vous préviens tout de suite : c'est de l'humour très vaseux...
véridique, mais tellement drôle
Dialogue de sourds
Transcription d'une communication radio entre l'US Navy et les autorités canadiennes au large de Terre Neuve en octobre 1997 ou 1995 selon les sources (Garantie authentique).
US Navy: Veuillez vous dérouter de 15 degrés nord pour éviter une collision. A vous.
Canada: Veuillez plutôt vous dérouter de 15 degrés sud pour éviter une collision. A vous.
US Navy: Ici le commandant d'un bâtiment des forces navales américaines.
Je répète: veuillez modifier votre course. A vous.
Canada: Non, veuillez vous dérouter, je vous prie. A vous.
US Navy: Ici porte-avions USS Lincoln, flotte navale des Etats-Unis, sous escorte de 3 destroyers et de 2 frégates.
Je vous demande de dévier votre route de 15 degrés nord ou des mesures contraignantes vont être prises
pour assurer la sécurité de notre navire. A vous.
Canada: Ici, c'est un phare. A vous.
Transcription d'une communication radio entre l'US Navy et les autorités canadiennes au large de Terre Neuve en octobre 1997 ou 1995 selon les sources (Garantie authentique).
US Navy: Veuillez vous dérouter de 15 degrés nord pour éviter une collision. A vous.
Canada: Veuillez plutôt vous dérouter de 15 degrés sud pour éviter une collision. A vous.
US Navy: Ici le commandant d'un bâtiment des forces navales américaines.
Je répète: veuillez modifier votre course. A vous.
Canada: Non, veuillez vous dérouter, je vous prie. A vous.
US Navy: Ici porte-avions USS Lincoln, flotte navale des Etats-Unis, sous escorte de 3 destroyers et de 2 frégates.
Je vous demande de dévier votre route de 15 degrés nord ou des mesures contraignantes vont être prises
pour assurer la sécurité de notre navire. A vous.
Canada: Ici, c'est un phare. A vous.
Les courses hippiques, lorsqu'elles s'y frottent.
Re: une ptite joke...
Je suis blondeboubbie wrote:Une ptite joke sur les blondes pas trop cruelle
Re: une ptite joke...
Pourtant t'en as pas l'air !didine wrote: Je suis blonde
Kto ne kurit i ne p'yot, tot zdoroven'kim pomret.