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Erreurs dans mon texte anglais ?

Posted: 09 Nov 2005 03:31
by One shot
Hello

pourriez me dire si ce texte anglais ne contient aucune erreur ?

merci
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Meeting a woman is a great opportunity which can change your life. you have to be equal to the task of confronting this challenge. If you want to succeed, You have to break bad habits :

1. eat sanely
Avoid hamburger, french fries and super-sized soda, It's not good for you. It will drive you absolutely nuts and it will ruin your charm. Just remember one thing : You are what you eat !


2. stop smoking right now.
smoking will NOT make you attractive to women, it will give them a headache ! Of course, it's not easy to stop smoking, but there is a solution that worked to perfection: be relax. If you follow this program, you can be sure that you will never light up a cigarette again !

3. play sports
Sport is vital. It will give you the energy you need to attract women. So don't wait another second, and join a fitness club!

4. Lose your blues
Anxiety is your worst enemy. it really can poison your life. If you want to overcome it, don't be ashamed to consult psychologist (It doesn't mean that you are insane !)
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Posted: 09 Nov 2005 06:28
by Maïwenn
quelques corrections :

je ne suis pas sure que sanely existe. Je te conseille eat healthy food

be relaxED

a solution that worked to perfection : plutot works, non ? Si ca ne marche plus ca ne donne pas envoe d'essayer ;)

to consult a psychologist ou to consult psychologistS

Est-ce que ca marche aussi pour draguer les mecs ? ;)

Re: Erreurs dans mon texte anglais ?

Posted: 09 Nov 2005 13:13
by Olso
One shot wrote: If you want to overcome it, don't be ashamed to consult psychologist (It doesn't mean that you are insane !)
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Y a pas mal de francismes dans ce texte, mais il sonne bien anglais, la preuve que le globish c'est easy ;) (à l'écrit) à force de mettre du franglais partout.

Je sais pas si ça se dit "to consult psychologist". "To consult", c'est de l'anglais ? Dit-on bien psychologist ? En tout cas, il faut ajouter "a" avant "psychologist".

Posted: 09 Nov 2005 19:41
by theos
Ces phrases sont bien écrits. Les seuls problèmes ce sont:

'but there is a solution that workS PERFECTLY: RELAX.'

Effectivement je ne comprends pas ce que tu veux dire par 'a solution that works to perfection'... et 'relax' simplement c'est mieux que 'be relaxed'

De plus, 'If you want to overcome it, don't be ashamed ABOUT consultING A psychologist' sera mieux.

Aussi fais attention aux ponctuations....

Posted: 10 Nov 2005 00:15
by One-shot
ok merci !

Posted: 10 Nov 2005 01:52
by ANTHOS
Meeting the right woman is a great opportunity to change your life. You have to be able to rise to this challenge. If you want to succeed, You have to break bad habits :

1. eat healthily
Avoid hamburgers, french fries and super-sized sodas, They’re not good for you. They will drive you absolutely nuts and ruin your charm. Just remember one thing : You are what you eat !


2. stop smoking right now.
smoking will NOT make you attractive to women, it will give them a headache ! Of course, it's not easy to stop smoking, but there is a solution that works like a charm: relax. If you follow this programme, you can be sure that you’ll never light a cigarette again !

3. do sports
Sports are vital. They will give you the energy you need to attract women. So don't wait another second: join a fitness club!

4. Lose your blues
Anxiety is your worst enemy. it can really poison your life. If you want to overcome it, don't be ashamed to consult a psychologist (It doesn't mean that you are insane !)

==

J’ai modifié la premier phrase comme je l’ai compris. Mais la phrase me semble vouloir dire que la femme est uniquement un moyen pour changer sa vie…La phrase cloche un peu. Peut-etre:
When you meet the right woman, you also have a great opportunity to change your life.

Re: Erreurs dans mon texte anglais ?

Posted: 10 Nov 2005 02:33
by decay
One shot wrote: 4. Lose your blues
Anxiety is your worst enemy. it really can poison your life. If you want to overcome it, don't be ashamed to consult psychologist (It doesn't mean that you are insane !)
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Je mettrais plutôt "don't be ashamed to go see a therapist" mais ça sonne peut être un peu général.