Opinions wanted on English-Spanish translation of lyrics

[Runa27]

Well, I'm trying to practice my Spanish by translating some song lyrics into Spanish. I get the feeling some parts of it have ended up kind of clumsy, though, so I thought I'd post what I've finished so far to here and see what you guys had to say about it. :)

The original English portions (by the way, the song is originally from the musical episode of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer", so when he sings "I died", yep, he's serious, and technically being literal :P):

I died
So many years ago
But you can make me feel
Like it isn't so
And why you come to be with me
I think I finally know

You're scared
Ashamed of what you feel
And you can't tell the ones you love
You know they couldn't deal
Whisper in a dead man's ear
It doesn't make it real


My translation, so far:

Morí
Hace muchos años.
Pero tú puedes hacer yo sentir
Como si que no está cierto.
Y por qué vienes estar con yo,
Finalmente pienso saber.

Tienes miedo.
Avergonzado de que sientes.
Y no puedes contar las personas que sientes cariño por;
Sabes que ellos no puden arreglárselas.
Susurras en el oído de hombre muerte.
Que no hace él real.

Pretty much I was relying on my (somewhat diminished, now that I'm not taking a class in it) scant memories of Spanish + my electronic Spanish dictionary, so, yeah. It probably has at least a couple of hilarious bad translations. :P Especially since I'm not yet very good, I think, with idioms.

What do you guys think so far, though?


-Runa27

[Manuela]

Hi Runa,

You translation is quite good... but there are things which are not right, I am sorry... I will fix that out, so that you can have a better version, ok ?

I died
So many years ago
But you can make me feel
Like it isn't so
And why you come to be with me
I think I finally know

You're scared
Ashamed of what you feel
And you can't tell the ones you love
You know they couldn't deal
Whisper in a dead man's ear
It doesn't make it real



Morí
Hace tantos años
Pero tú puedes hacerme sentir
Que no es así
Y por qué vienes a estar conmigo
Creo que por fin lo sé

Tienes miedo
Avergonzado de lo que sientes (or Te avergüenzas de lo que sientes)
Y no puedes decirlo a quienes amas
Sabes que no podrían manejarlo (entenderlo)
Susurrar al oído de un hombre muerto
No lo hace (lo vuelve) real